Below the half century mark!

days left.

Monday is the court hearing. I hope it goes well. I'm not attending. I cant afford to miss my class. This stuff is too hard to teach myself and I shouldnt have to.

Still no sign of my 90,000.

I did call the States Attorney's office yesterday to see why some of my complaints havent showed up online and when they will actually go to trial. My rep called back and asked for some letters - one of those complaints the cop didnt want to make a call on but had me sign. So I dont get it. Anyway, I'm stopping by there this morning to talk to her and drop off the information.

I was picturing to myself today what it will be like to have this over. I'm pretty sure he'll never really leave us alone permanently - tho I dont see how he is going to survive in the long run either. But I can try to keep the order going and, if I cant, and he bothers us I'll have a new one put in place. Having the divorce done will open up a lot of mental energy in that I wont have to worry anymore about the car situation, the money, custody. All those will be put to rest.

So not too long to go! The Xmas season just flies by anyway.

We've got letters! (Well, email)

to go!

I rec'd an email from our minister yesterday. She said FSO had come by the church the week before - probably the same day he stopped by the lawyer. Apparently his landlord is driving him around. At that point, she realized how very sick he is. And he called her on the phone yesterday and she had to hang up on him due to the ranting. She also forwarded some emails members of the church rec'd last week.

I forward these to my lawyer and I'm going to drop off copies of them with the doctor on Monday. In these, he envisions spending regular time with the girls. Eeek!

From: FSO
Date: 11/16/07 22:15:56
To: A group of friends who must be shocked and some family who must be sad
Subject: Why I love the ones I love

These are the people I love the most, without whom I would not have survived the hell I have been thru (Mental Hospitals, Jail, Homeless shelters, sleeping on the streets of the city ).

1. My Lord and Shepard – Jesus Christ
I was born a Shiite Muslim and because a mullah (stupid idea of my mom) slapped me for questioning the rationale of muttering something to God I did not understand, I lost all interest in God and religion. Fame and $$ made me arrogant to the point that my faith in God was almost non existent. 10 months ago, God decided to take everything from me – My wife, Kids, $$ and has not let me see my love (***) for over 6 months. On top of that close friends and family have abandoned me. I have lost my job after 12.5 years. All this has happened to a man who had the world by the balls (Google me - I am in Business Week, Fast Company and half a dozen Leadership text books).
Something very strange happened 6 months ago in Jail. I had just gotten up, when I had this vision – A man walks up to me with a gun and holds it up to my head and says “ Buster – u have 3 seconds to decide ON YOUR GOD OF CHOICE before I blow your brains out”. Without hesitation I said Jesus Christ. At first I thought it was my predisposition due to my catholic school upbringing, but since this vision I have been saved by him from the jaws of death at least 6 times, I have to believe that this was more than that. Next Sunday I get baptized in a tank in a nearby black church in *** **** . That will be a public recognition of the immortal I am supposed to love the most. Note the word supposed.

2. SOME POOR WOMAN – The Woman I love with every cell in my body.
One look at the smiling face of *** took care of my depression of 34 years. I met her at the *** Red Roof Inn. She was the front desk manager. She listened to my stories for 3 hours flat and I fell madly in love with her. Ours is a platonic relationship so far, but I have always wanted SPW as my wife and mother of my children. This is all too fast for SPW who has not spent more than 8 hours with me and not seen me for 6 months. No matter whether we stay just friends or become lovers or husband and wife only time will tell and whatever happens will be the will of God. All I can say is that I will never be able to repay this woman for what she has done for my soul. Also I have never seen a woman of such integrity in days when we simply start our relationships by jumping in bed . IT’S VERY HARD FOR ME AS A MORTAL NOT TO PUT SPW 1st, but every time I do it I get slapped on my hand by JC. Perhaps that is why he has kept me away from SPW physically for so long. I strongly believe that JC had something to do with my meeting SPW. The RRI where I stayed was only within a 10 mile radius of my sister, brother and Aunt. If they had given me shelter in their homes, I would never have met her..

3. FVV – My Landlord, who took me in without references - nothing. He saw a man in deep pain and did what Christ wants us all to do – HELP THY NEIGHBOR LIKE U WANT TO HELPED YOURSELF. Bill is very spiritual and he is a TRUE CHRISTIAN even though he never goes to church. FVV is a Vietnam Vet who has fallen on hard times and again the Lord has brought us together because he wants me to focus all my energies on improving the lot of veterans and men and women in uniform. THAT WILL BE MY FOCUS AS I RUN FOR CONGRESS FROM THE 14th Congressional District of Illinois (Dennis Hastert’s vacant seat). I have no $, just ideas and lots of Passion. We will see what The American people REALLY want at the end of the day.

4. My Adopted Country – The United States .
I think our country is **really** up. I started to make a list of the top 10 problems with our country and I am already up to 70 items. How is that, that the most prosperous country like ours is so badly managed. Coincidentally I have solutions for all 70, but I have to resist the urge to tackle them all and focus on showing gratitude to our men and women in uniform.

5. Strangers/Friends ( I know I will miss someone here and that’s the danger of listing people)
a. My Brother **** in Jail. He treated me a million times better than my own brother.

b. My sisters - **** – Correction Officer at County Jail in city
- WOMAN FROM LETTER – SPW’s best friend who gave me invaluable insights into what I was doing wrong in my relationship. I miss her advice. I wish there was a way to communicate with her.
- *** – From my church . Another fine woman with a big heart.
c. My Friend in LA who works for ----. *** – Cant find his email now. He has faith me more than a mustard seed. I owe him $300.
d. My Lawyer – *** who has never passed judgment on me and helped bail me out of jail when no one else would. Lawyers are scum but NOT ***. If u want an honest man, look up ***
e. My Doctor – *** – Uses his right brain with his left one. Always had faith in me.
f. Members of the *** Church
g. Staff at the Comfort Inn in ***
h. My aunt in SRI LANKA and her daughter in *** . That’s the only family members who cared.
i. *** and *** @ *** of Mental Health – They were the only ones who told me that I did NOT belong there. They said “take your meds, fake it and get the * out” which is EXACTLY what I did. So much for my MANIA diagnosis !! I can fake anything. After all I was the best actor in my high school in 7thgrade !! These high faluting shrinks had no idea who they were dealing with.

6. My 2 Daughters – *** and *** that I have been prevented from seeing for 10 months and might not see for another year !! Their minds have been poisoned by a vindictive ex wife (I don’t know why she is so vindictive)

7. My ex-bosses
- Late ***
- *** (*’s old boss. She is a big shot at *** now)
- ***
- *** – Ran into him the other day at Fry’s
- *** (God knows where he is. God Bless his soul)
8. My *** Colleagues
- *, *, *, *, *
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
NOW THE SHIT LIST ...

The *** family that makes close to 2 million $ collectively could not find $4000 to get me out of jail. I was in jail for 4 months for my credit card being denied for $45 and the taxi driver told the police to arrest. Not once did my brother and sister drive 300 miles from *** to see me. WHY ???
They also failed to pay $300 for my bail in Illinois when my wife put me in Jail for sending email to an alias that by mistake contained my 2 daughters. My sister said – I will bail u out if u go to the mental hospital. I told the officers – Tell my sister to take a f-g hike !! *** my lawyer bailed me out

My aunt *** *** who makes 0.5 M $ as an allergist could not rally the ***family to bail me out. But what can I expect from her ? She is the one who left her mentally sick sister to be homeless in *** and deficate in an apt with neighbors screaming on. Did anyone incl myself have the heart to bring my aunt *** to the U.S to get treatment so she could spend the rest of her life in relative piece. I CERTAINLY DID NOT BECAUSE I WAS SHIT SCARED OF MY WIFE RIPPING INTO ME FOR SPENDING THE $$. I WILL ALWAYS REPENT FOR WHAT I DID NOT DO. SOMEDAY WHEN I HAVE SOME $$ I WILL BUILD THE FINEST MENTAL INSTITUTION/HOME WITH HER NAME ON IT

SOMETIMES I WISH I COULD CHANGE MY LAST NAME BECAUSE I AM SO ASHAMED OF IT. WE ARE THE MOST DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY I HAVE SEEN. INSTEAD I PLAN ON SHOWING MY GIRLS THAT SOME CHINWALLAs LIKE THEIR DAD ARE STILL DECENT HUMAN BEINGS WHO CARE.

ON TOP OF THIS I HAVE AN ABUSIVE MOTHER WHO SAYS THE FOLLOWING:
1. Well u should love me more than *** because I love u the most. No, Mom u are SICK. U loved me more than your own husband that’s why u have such a f-d up marriage and now u want me to do the same ? No f-g way..
2. U have adopted Jesus instead of Allah as your god. Yes Mom I did and if u know anything about monotheistic religions u should know it does not matter..


3 folks who worked for me –
1. M – I risked my job and let her go on PAID LOA for 2 months after she had been with MOT only a week because her mother was dying of leukemia. Could not spare $300 to bail me out of Jail.
2. N – Cancelled my customer mtg in Japan , upgraded to first class out of my own pocket, so I could make the wake of his 1 yr old son in Chicago . Did he ever say * – u must be very lonely. Come to my house for Dinner one night Made a big f*g deal when he grudgingly gave me $400.

3. L – Gave me a big lecture about how he does not lend $ to anyone when I needed $300 to get out of Jail.

4. H - An ex boss who said “I HAVE DECIDED NOT TO LOAN U $500. This guy is an exec VP.

I bring this up not to tear them down, but to demonstrate that people who I thought were good at heart have replaced kindness with the all mighty $ in their hearts. Remember the line from XMAS CAROL when Scrooge’s girl friend tells him “Ours was an old promise – A Golden Idol has replaced me in your heart” I believe that the mighty $ has replaced GOD in the hearts of most Americans.

So I ask u my friends for the following. PLEASE PRAY THAT:
1. My faith in God Continues to grow stronger
2. I get to see my ** real soon, even if its just as a friend. I miss her something awful.
3. I get to do what God has set me forth to do.
4. My divorce and all these frivolous cases against me are settled FAIRLY.
5. Get to see my daughters on a regular basis. I miss them terribly…
6. Give an ANTIDOTE to this terrible loneliness

Thanks for reading so far …
I suggest reading just these 3 books that I think have the wisdom that u will ever need;

1. Holy Bible – This is the best self help book there is and its FREE !! I encourage my non Christian friends to read it because it reads like a story book and is quite non denominational.
2. The PRAYERFUL SPIRIT By Dr. James Gills M.D
3. Who moved My Cheese

--FSO

Go Directly To Jail - but not yet

I talked to the actual states attorney yesterday. I fear I am pestering my rep too much. Or maybe she is off this week.

I found that he probably turned himself in as described earlier but was able to post bond immediately. Since he came in with a family member, that is probably likely.

Then I confirmed there is a warrant out for him because he didnt bother showing up to court. His next court date in criminal court is Dec 3 - the same day as the car and 90,000 hearing. She told me I had to tell an officer there, when I saw him, that there is a warrant out for his arrest and they will take care of it. I wont be there, however, and I highly doubt my attorney will want to do it. So I'm just going to store the "Go Directly To Jail" card under the board for right now. It might come in handy later. I'm going to talk to my attorney about it. Plus since he has a Dec 3 hearing and I think he'll miss it, he wont be able to claim he was in there to go to criminal court, and another warrant will come out for him. This is a good thing I think.


to go!

Its already in the 50's!!!

60 to go!

Our divorce has gone into Slaughter Rule.

Anything he does now - even bringing in an attorney - will be movement but not action. He has already lost the game by virtue of the fact that he no longer can control anything that hurts us. So the game is over and we are just waiting for it to run out.

Take the 90,000 order...
Even if the 90,000 is stopped, 43,000 of it is child support and that cannot be reversed according to my lawyer. The judge agreed to the rest of it. The only problem I can see is that the judge will not agree that FSO should pay the penalty and interest I had to pay on the moneys I used to pay FSO's debts, and he might stop his child support/maintenance. This means I would end up with around 65,000 instead of 90,000. I didnt count on any of that and actually thought I would come out with 30,000 when we went in October.

I'm not entirely certain of course but I'm pretty sure he wont be able to see the girls until he has been in treatment for a while and is stable. Plus he would have to continue his treatment if he wanted to continue seeing them.

That leaves the division of our assets. Well, my lawyer is pretty certain we'll have his share of the house transferred to me in lieu of some child support. Any moneys he owes me will come from his half. So my educated guess is he'll have to pay me some $64,000 of his 401K plus my half of the stock options - used to be 60,000 but now my guess is they are worth around 20,000 if that. Its simple and straight forward and it will be fine to be done with it.

So he can file motions, etc. its all movement and no action. He entered the fray too late to be of much effect.


The dogs bark, but the caravan moves on!

Another Avenue Cut Off

My son's girlfriend's father did call FSO and tell him to stop contacting them. He said he was okay in the very beginning but then began going off on a rant about Hastert. He said it ended with FSO not making any sense at all.

My son went to the doctor on Sat to give his interview to help determine whether he should have any contact with the girls. Oldest son said the doc was flabbergasted - "What role did he exactly play in your family?" Oldest son explained he played no role - just basically existed in his own world, refused any attempts to bring him in long term to our family, and did whatever he pleased. He said the doc told him he is clearly psychotic. The doc observed to him that supervised visits would also be a problem as there is no way to control his rants. He has yet to call the girls' therapist. And now that we have a phone number for him (via the girlfriend's family) he is going to try and get an interview with him AND get him to sign a paper asking for his medical records. And I have to drop off a crazy letter he wrote right before he was kicked out. The doc said he'd call me this week to let me know his conclusions.

Two motions

For starters, I did extremely well on both of my tests. Hooray for me!

Good I shut the lawyer off as FSO showed up in her office on Tuesday in person.

He went to court and filed two motions on his own. He has no lawyer at this point.

First, he wants his car back. In the motion, he claims I took it illegally and am illegally impounding it.

Second, he wants the $90,000 order turned around.


My lawyer said she thinks neither will be granted.

The car is under a restriction by the State of Illinois and cannot be licensed until February. That is unless he goes to Cook County court and gets a court order turning it around. He already was given a second car - the Camry - and its gone somewhere. Actually, it was towed away after a hit and run accident he had in a suburb one over from us and its gone for good. He has many accidents and his taking the car while it is under title to both of us is a big risk to me and our financial well being. So she is pretty sure "no" on the car.

She also thought the request to stop the 90000 will also be rejected. She said its already been reviewed by this judge and given to us, and its already been filed with his company. We are just waiting for them to send the money. She thinks he'll be told to address it when he comes to the divorce trial on Jan 18th.

He didnt bother to show up for his criminal hearings on Tuesday even though he was in the courthouse at the time. I talked to our states attorney rep and she told me there is another warrant for his arrest. I left a msg for her saying he is planning to be in the courthouse on Dec 3 for his two motions. I want to find out if they will go arrest him there.

Also, I noticed the last two complaints I signed did not show up on Vinelink. I have to find out about those.

And life goes on...

Incommunicado

I told my attorney and her secretary not to call me for any reasons until Friday. I have two big exams coming up on Wed and Thurs and I do not want to lose my focus.

I did report the threat to the police. Since I couldnt argue the threat was third party and since they didnt seem interested in it as a threat, I just made the report and forwarded it to the States Attorney. Once the doc is done with the tape, they want it to keep with his records. They are going to decide whether to press charges on that or not.

My son's girlfriend's folks did try calling him at the number he gave except they said it wasnt his number. Last I heard, her dad was going to try and get the number from caller id or their phone service provider so he could call FSO and tell him no contact of any type in the future.

Only

to go!

Slow but sure!

He has a court date today in Criminal Court. In fact, I think two of his cases have come up today. They dont expect him to show but who knows? He is pretty unpredictable.

I asked about the timing of my check for 90000 coming. Its not good news. She said it will be a minimum of two weeks from last week and that they can take longer if they want to. I am to get in touch with her in another week if I dont hear anything.


Back to my wonderfully predictable world of the Calculus!

OMG!

Where to start?

First, only

to go!

That means over the weekend we'll move into the 60's. I remember when it was in the 100's. Time moves on whether you want it to or not!

Lots of things going on.

Most importantly, the order for the BUCKS was filed in court on Tuesday and sent that day to his 401K holder. I dont know how long it takes after that but I believe she told me around six weeks from when we first went in on it. Which would make it maybe a week or two to go.


As it is, I'm just hanging in there thanks to Mother!

Two more violations of the Order and a bizarre turn of events.

One was three letters sent to my son's girlfriend's parents. Now, we only know them from being my son's girlfriend and had met them at her graduation. Very nice people. I guess you would say they are more meditative on how they handle things.


tho "meditative" was not the word Mother used. lol

They rec'd these letters way back Oct 9, didnt know what to do with them, and didnt want to upset my son. So they sat on them. I found out Saturday while shopping with my daughters in our "Martha Stewarting" of our house. (For that, see my other blog!) After going back and forth with my son as to how to best handle them, I went there and picked up the letters. They are the same old sick things. Including a threat on theirs that he is going to have his "REVENGE" (upper case letters are his.) He sounds a bit obsessive about their daughter - how wonderful she is - in his letter to her and his letter to them. And he has a letter to my son giving him a list of things to do for him, and asking him to lend him all his money at 50% interest. My son has shown no interest in seeing the letter so I'm just going to file it.

I filed a complaint with the police (3rd party communication) when I heard from the cop (one that I think felt too much empathy for the FSO) that he had been in the station last week turning himself in (with a family member) for an outstanding warrant. The cop couldnt remember anything about what I asked him. "Was it late in the week?" "I dont remember" "Did he come with a man or woman?" "I dont remember." He did remember he was cordial but obviously goofy. So FSO didnt show up in Vinelink. And the States Attorney thought he was still waiting in the hospital for him. And they still dont know how he came to be out.

On Monday nite, I got a phone call from his girlfriend's parents (who will have to get a "pen" name for this blog if they continue to show up in it!) saying he had left them a creepy phone message. They taped it for me and I now have it. After I drop the kids off, I'm headed to the police to file a report of a threat. I know they wont make it a complaint - the States Attorney wants the report number and said she'll take it from there. But, really, whats the point when he is allowed to do as he pleases? In the tape he says:

"I'm going to make Eudoxia and our son look really bad. They done me bad and you do the man of the Lord bad you know what happens folks. I dont have to tell you two that."

But there is a bunch of crazy stuff in there. He's an "adopted" Christian. Jesus is his savior. Everyone could look at his life and see how great things happen when you accept Jesus in your heart. That God has a plan for him or he would have had him die already. That God had him go through all these troubles just to let him see somethign or other - never really did understand that one. Blah de blah blah.


He's running for office again! Only this time he is going for Hastert's spot instead of Obama's. LOL. Guess he had to take a step down.

He has a girlfriend Jessica. Thats the name of the girl in the crazy emails he sent too but not the name of the woman he told us to send his papers to. Dont know if its a figment of his imagination or what. She is very pure - wont even hold his hand until he is divorced. Hmmmm. Said all he needs in life is a cup of tea and Jessica.

He closes with the threat and thats thats the end of that story.

Except....

I was thinking how his connection with these people - tho imagined - is something that feeds his mental needs. That he feels important. He can vent on us. And, the scary thing, is he is obviously becoming more obsessed about their daughter. I had a feeling they are pretty much in the dark about how sick he is beyond what they heard. So I put together a packet for them - his arrest records in his new home state, his criminal court cases here, the letter I wrote for the States Attorney in his commitment hearing, his commitment order, the crazy emails and two timelines (police, threats, accidents, Order breaks and Psychiatric treatment.) I wrote up a note saying that since we immersed in the problem we dont see how much others are in the dark. And that the packet should give them a good view of whats going on with him. I also told them I did strongly believe they needed to tell him directly to stop all contact with them. They are not his friends. He does not play any role in our family. He is a non-entity. I stopped by to talk to them briefly and they did say they were planning on contacting him to tell him to stop all contact. My son's girlfriend's mom felt very worried about his frequent references to their daughter and her dad finally concurred after listening to the message he left once again. So that is VERY good news.

Then I saw the doctor for a second time. He wanted to know what I was afraid of when allowing visitation and what did I want for him to be able to visit. I am afraid of him being cunning enough to take the kids from a supervised meeting and disappear into his new home state. I am afraid for the physical safety of my kids when with him - both in a car, or in person because of his temper issues. I'm afraid they will be mentally bruised by exposure to him. My requirements were that he meet all aspects of the treatment of his illnesses for a minimum of six months as verified by the providers themselves and that he be stable. I told him that since they have no relationship with their dad that any visits would be forced and would only be for him. He said at the end that there was no court going to make the kids even have supervised visits with him. I signed off permission for the therapist to talk to him.

And I thought thats about it but yesterday I was checking their old emails - the ones he knows - and I found an American Girl Halloween card sent from my one daughter's old account to my other's old account. They never log on to these and in fact, have new ones that are not name related. I found it highly unlikely it came from my oldest girl. So I kind of felt her out yesterday to see if they sent e-cards to each other on Halloween. I sent to my SIL and one of my friends so it wouldnt be unusual. She said she had forgotten to send her one. My theory is he sent it using her old account as the sender. They never saw it and they dont know about it so no big deal. I shut off the two accounts. I have two accounts of my own that I've been using regularly and I'm going to shut down the one he knows. In fact, I tried to but Yahoo couldnt. And its still up this morning. Will try again after this blogging.

And, now, thats about it. I have lots of things coming due now so am very busy. I'm glad there is not much to do re: this stuff.