Aaaaarrrrrgh!

I've had it! I can no longer bear living this lie. I want to be free to have a new relationship. I'm sick of being almost 50 yrs old and sleeping with my two kids. (He wont even trade beds with me tho the girls are getting rather large for us all to fit in a full size bed.) I'm tired of being alone all the time. There is no loneliness like being with someone and still being alone. I want things settled. I dont want to deal with his temper tantrums and interference. I'm tired of talking about the future in the abstract. I want a relationship where the other person actually likes me, is happy to see me and wants to be with me. I'm anxious to move on and try my luck elsewhere. And being alone is better than this.

Its time to take action. I can not last two more years. And I've had a recent change of heart re: my schooling and now we might be looking at three years. I simply cannot do it. I made an appt with his/my therapist to see how to best handle this.